{"id":3377,"date":"2024-09-07T06:34:19","date_gmt":"2024-09-07T06:34:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.todayatthelakeblog.com\/?p=3377"},"modified":"2024-09-07T06:34:19","modified_gmt":"2024-09-07T06:34:19","slug":"poopy-mood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/?p=3377","title":{"rendered":"Poopy Mood"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Wind:<\/strong> from S 3.5 m\/sec (8 mph); Air Temperature:<\/strong> 24.2 \u00b0C (76 \u00b0F); Water Temperature:<\/strong> 22.11 \u00b0C (72 \u00b0F)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Today at the lake, it was cooling down from a 90-degree day. There were still a lot of people at the lake when I arrived after 7pm. Everyone is squeezing out every last drop of summer. Why not? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I felt like crap, but made myself go to the lake anyway, figuring that even if all I did was float, it would be better than staying in the hot house. When I started to enter the lake, a guy on a jetski drove right through the swim area (they removed the ropes a week ago). I yelled over to him that he should not be in the swimming area because he could hurt someone. He nodded, and to his credit, I didn\u2019t see him do that again. But there were others out there. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I swam across the length of the swim area and back, then decided to swim north to get to quieter water. There were huge wakes in the water from all the motor boats (I hate them). I tried to pace myself, sticking with breast stroke because I was way too tired for crawl. I tried to think of anything other than how sick I felt. I tried to think of anything other than how much I dislike the summer crowds because so many people don\u2019t treat the park and the lake with respect. I tried to get out of my head. I wasn\u2019t very successful. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019ve had about four swims lately that I haven\u2019t recorded because I\u2019m too tired and cranky to write when I get home. Usually nothing sticks with me in the water, but lately it doesn\u2019t always work that way. I\u2019m trying to dramatically downsize and move into a tiny living situation, and it\u2019s too hard. Friends have helped, but it\u2019s still too hard. I don\u2019t know how to organize things or space. I have ten years of stuff in storage to go through. It\u2019s brutal. My friends push me to just toss it all, but I can\u2019t do that. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Some of those things are either important to me or things I had to pack away 10 years ago when I downsized for graduate school, and I want them back in my life. I don\u2019t have the same rules about what I keep or dispose of. How long it\u2019s been in storage doesn\u2019t mean anything because the past 10 years have been a shit show. I lost the life I had, and now I\u2019m trying to figure out where I am, what I want. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I don\u2019t have a partner, kids, a job, so my photos are important to me. I don\u2019t want to throw out old cards and letters until I look through them and maybe scan some of them. I have lots of medical records I need, too. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I also don\u2019t have the same brain that my friends have. My level of impairment makes figuring out spaces very challenging. Being poor makes things harder, too, because my impulse is to have doubles and quadruples of things since I can\u2019t afford to replace them in the future. And on it goes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Last night I had a dream that I sores all over my body and couldn\u2019t breathe. They took me off a plane and put me in the hospital, and they said I was dying. In the dream nobody would take me to the clinic for the required treatment, and I was afraid I was going to die. Then I woke up, feeling awful. AND, my telehelath therapy appointment was canceled. And I actually do have weird sores that don’t heal and trouble breathing. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s why I made myself go to the lake. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The water is the perfect temperature right now. Very cool but not cold. Refreshing. The sun is setting earlier every week, so that makes the water quite dark. I could see see the milfoil stalks, the random bubbles of hidden lake creatures, and the rocks on the lake floor. I saw part of a large fish tonight, just as it darted out of my way. I\u2019m not used to seeing large fish move that fast. Usually they seem unfazed by my presence. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I enjoyed swimming north because there are large gaps in the milfoil where there are sandy areas with just ground cover type of weeds. And the water is quite shallow, so I when I\u2019m tired it feels safe since I can get to standing height quickly. The milfoil looks pretty beat up at this point. There are parts of the weeds that have lost their fringe, and there are faded parts. There are broken pieces floating in the water. I will be happy when the summer people disappear. <\/p>\n\n\n

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\"\"<\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

The lake has been abused this summer, and it needs to rest. I feel the same way, actually. It\u2019s been kind of a crummy summer. Too many big life issues going on. Getting kicked out of my housing has been crazy. How to downsize, move, and find affordable housing? It has consumed all my energy and my summer. Not happy about that, but I\u2019m also focussed on my new home. I want it to work out. I want to get past this anger and frustration. I want to make a plan, work toward something rather than respond to things.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I ended up turning around before I thought I would, and I swam back toward the cement dock. I didn\u2019t want to get too close to it because yesterday it smelled like shit. I talked to two guys who were on the ladders when I did my chin-ups, and one of them suggested that maybe a boat dumped its sewage there. Fuck! What is wrong with people. Use some sense and respect that other people use the lake. It’s crazy to me that boaters don’t seem to use any caution around the swim areas. They just barge into the few small areas set aside for swimming. If the parks department would leave the ropes up it would help.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I got to the shallow water in the swim area and looked up at the benches past the beach, hoping to see my friends. Not tonight. I had a nice chat with some women at the showers who had gone swimming in their clothes. One was wearing a cute embroidered black skirt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I showered fast, then got dressed under my towel. I texted my friends a photo of the water. I know my camera didn\u2019t capture the pink tint on the water, reflected off the sky, but that was the spirit in which I sent it. Check out what nature\u2019s doing tonight. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Thanks, lake. I\u2019ll try to be better next time. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Wind: from S 3.5 m\/sec (8 mph); Air Temperature: 24.2 \u00b0C (76 \u00b0F); Water Temperature: 22.11 \u00b0C (72 \u00b0F) Today at the lake, it was cooling down from a 90-degree day. There were still a lot of people at the lake when I arrived after 7pm. Everyone is squeezing out every last drop of summer. READ MORE<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":6751,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[2,4,9],"tags":[95,178],"class_list":["post-3377","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-chronic-illness","category-mental-health","category-swim-experience","tag-lakeswimming","tag-water-quality"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/todayatthelake.blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/09\/8774D3EF-249F-431B-93CE-7D20726A277F_4_5005_c.jpeg?fit=480%2C360&ssl=1","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3377","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3377"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3377\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/6751"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3377"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3377"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/todayatthelake.blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3377"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}